Mid-May Panic Attack

Oh Christ. Things we are panicking about, in no particular order:

(1) Did the boy choose the right college? Should we have pushed for Gonzaga?

(2) Elena Kagan? Who's correct here, Greenwald or Lessig?

(3) Maggie Gallagher is spewing her anti-gay venom over on the west side tonight! Is asphyxiation likely if I stay in midtown? How sure are you? I am fresh out of plastic sheeting and duct tape.

(4) Cubs, 6 1/2 games back and in 5th place.

(5) The ability to string more than two archaeology-related sentences together has deserted me just in time for being over budget on the current work project.

(6) Is it payday yet? No? Crap.

Oh, Facebook, You Pose Such Conundrums

Is it rude to de-friend a family member? How long would it take him to notice? I already hide him from my news feed, so in order to be aware of him at all I have to look him up, which I should not do, but sometimes curiosity gets the best of me and then I spend the next couple of hours with a knot in my stomach and the veins in my head playing that nasty kaBOOSH kaBOOSH cadence on a nonstop loop. You'd think I would have learned by now.

He's getting married in October. That should be a fun wedding; I'm hoping that instead of the usual bride-groom split on either side of the aisle the ushers ask Right-wing Conservative Evangelical Military Worshipping Obama Haters or Reality-based Community?

My Real WTF Moment

Olbermann's getting on my nerves more often than not. Tonight's WTF Moment was busting on Bush for reading too many books during his administration. Granted, the man was apparently ripping through them at a rate prodigious enough to suggest that other duties might have been neglected, but maybe that early bedtime was set up to accommodate his history book jones, and after spending eight years bashing Bush's apparent lack of intellectual curiosity, it's disingenuous to criticize him for reading too much history, for crissakes. That none of it seemed to sink in is another matter entirely.

Anyway.

My WTF moment came this evening, which is Day Five of a fucking sinus infection that has completely put me on my ass, which came on the heels of a groin pull, which came on the heels of sore knees, if knees have heels, which came on the heels of a perpetually spasming deltoid and triceps, which came on the heels of an inflamed rotator cuff, which came on the heels of another goddamn migraine, and my stress levels are through the roof. It goes something like this: I officially lost twenty pounds, have been eating healthy home-cooked meals rather than going out, have been working out like a maniac, have largely eschewed alcohol other than the occasional glass or two of red wine, and have even been dutifully drinking more water, and after all that have officially felt like shit for about three months solid now. WTF?

I mean, seriously, WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK? The outcome was supposed to be the exact opposite of what it's turned out to be, and I'm pissed. Gimme a taco and a beer. All this health is fucking killing me.


Please, Jesus.

A Heart-rending Plea for Assistance

Can somebody please get my head on right as regards the Twitter? Seriously, am I supposed to let my followers know what I'm doing on a minute-by-minute basis, or just daily, or what? And is it bad that I forgot to check in for maybe three months after setting up the account? Am I obligated to pay attention to it now? I am flummoxed and do not enjoy the sensation one bit.