Friday, March 04, 2011

Today in Arizona Asshattery

Welcome to Arizona: Haberdashers to the Assholes of the Nation.

Our state legislature was very busy yesterday addressing the problems plaguing Arizonans. Namely, the current inability to put a Teatard license plate on their cars.
The budget is not balanced. The governor wants to eliminate health care for 250,000 people. Nearly one out of 10 Arizonans who want jobs can't find one. And there are plans to slash funding for higher education.

But that didn't keep the state Senate from taking the time Thursday to debate and approve a resolution supporting the Republican governor of Wisconsin in his fight with labor unions.

Senators also voted to create yet another special license plate. But unlike some others aimed at raising money for causes like spaying pets, service to veterans and organ donation, the proceeds from this license plate would benefit tea party groups around the state.

Hmm, you might say. This might seem wrong to you because you know that the special plates program is supposed to raise money for nonpartisan causes, not for political parties, and a plate "designed with a picture of the 'Don't Tread on Me' flag showing a coiled rattlesnake on a background of yellow" strikes you as being just a little bit political. Well, if that's the case, don't worry. Russell Pearce has that one covered for you.

Senate President Russell Pearce, R-Mesa, denied anything about it is political.

"I know the Constitution is something that not all folks have read down here," Pearce said. "And that's what this plate is about, about furthering the principles of freedom, about the movement across this country, about citizens who want certain principles followed with limited government and family values and kind of the sea-wind change that's coming across this country."

See, silly liberals? It's a sea-wind change about the Constitution and the right to mangle metaphors and possibly make up new ones any way you want! You can tell it's only about the Constitution, see, because the design doesn't mention the Constitution at all. And adopting the symbol of a political movement--even one made up of brain-dead racist nativists--makes it the exact opposite of political. Thanks, Russell Pearce. Just let me know the next time Opposite Day rolls around, so I can be prepared.

2 comments:

fev said...

"Russell Means has that one covered for you."

We all drop the occasional typo, but ... surely not Russell Means! (Still love the blog, of course.)

Boltgirl said...

Ha, that's what I get for typing in a blind rage. It's enough to make Russell Means cry!