How to Do It

How does this happen? I have asked myself that a few times in the past ten months, with "that" referring to the repeated ability of __________ [insert the party, gang, or cabal in Congress lacking fifty percent of the votes plus one] to get what they want. This is how it happens.

10 of the 19 Democrats who signed the initial Stupak letter to Pelosi voted against health reform even after their demands on abortion were met.

Hold your breath and swear you'll keep holding it 'til you turn blue if mommy makes you wash the dishes, unless you get a piece of cake first, and then take the proffered slice of cake, exhale, eat the slice, inhale, grab the rest of the cake, and sprint out the door, leaving the dishes to continue moldering in the sink. And then try it again the next night when you're asked to clean your room, with the same results, while mommy stands there and wonders why nothing ever gets done around here and she's running to the store for more goddamn Duncan Hines every night after work.

Sixty-Four

64. Sixty-four Democrats fell over themselves today to out-Republican the Republicans and vote for an amendment written by a fellow Democrat to the healthcare bill.

The amendment, written by Rep. Bart Stupak, D-Mich., would bar the new government insurance plan from covering abortions, except in cases of rape, incest, or where the life of the mother is in danger. The Democrats' original legislation would have allowed the government plan to cover abortions.

The amendment also would prohibit people who receive new federal health subsidies from buying insurance plans that include abortion coverage.

When the Stupak amendment first surfaced, some people had hoped that it was simply a bit of belt-and-suspenders redundancy intended to curtail any attempts to circumvent the execrable 1976 Hyde Amendment, which prevents funds allocated via the annual HHS appropriations from being used to pay for abortions. But that last bit, the part about no one being able to buy coverage that includes abortion from the to-be-established government exchange if they're using federal subsidies to acquire said coverage, takes it a step further.

Who were these 64 attempting to appease with this maneuver? Republicans in their districts who won't be voting for them anyway? Some subset of women who are both cash-poor and so conflicted by the potential for having to make a reproductive decision that they'll be relieved to have that bit of agency stripped from their lives?

Thanks to the grandstanding of the Democrats who joined every goddamn Republican in the House except, Arizona's own John Shaddegg (who voted 'present' in a tiny grandstanding protest of his own), the women who can least afford unwanted pregnancies are hit the hardest; if you get a federal subsidy and want abortion coverage, you'll need to buy a separate, abortion-only, policy with your own money. The availability and cost of those policies has not been addressed yet. Additionally, people who don't qualify for subsidies but wish to buy through the exchange fully on their own dime likely will see their options curtailed, as

Abortion-rights supporters say private insurers will not likely offer policies with abortion coverage in the exchange because many potential buyers will be getting federal subsidies.

Around 21 million people are expected to get coverage through the exchange by 2019, according to the Congressional Budget Office.

Amazingly, the Jehovah's Witnesses have not pressured any legislators to introduce amendments forbidding taxpayer-subsidized blood transfusions, nor have Orthodox Jews demanded that federal funds stop subsidizing neonatal care for uncircumsized male infants. Hello, House Democrats: abortion--even when rape, incest, and imminent maternal death are not conditioning factors--is. legal. in. America. End of story. Take away women's choices and you will, in some circumstances, inevitably create desperation that will result in horrible outcomes for existing women and their existing families.

Was your rep one of the 64? It's worth a look.

Words

As I sit simultaneously waiting for the California Supreme Court to announce its ruling on the Proposition 8 challenge and mulling the Sotomayor nomination, I keep coming back to two sets of words President Obama has let slip, only to have conservatives pounce on them and fling them back at us with monkey-poo abandon.

God is in the mix.

Carrie Prejean likes that one. So does everyone who opposes marriage equality on religious grounds. They are only too happy to remind us that our President, the one we threw our support to, is nominally on their side in this one.

Empathy.

The alleged Democratic majority should make Sotomayor's confirmation a done deal, at least on paper, at least until the Blue Dogs decide it's more important to roll over for Republicans than to advance any actual Democratic interests, and meanwhile John Boehner has already been bleating for a week that he will filibuster any nominee who intends to decide cases based on emotions and gut reactions and empathy rather than the law. Because of course that's how all the people Obama considered for the spot built their careers, on touchy-feelyness rather than legal knowledge. But none of the real legal-world qualifications matter any more, because now the opposition has the E-word to pour into the troughs for the base to snarf up and spit back over and over and over.

In a world where the sound bite has replaced reasoned discourse, and regurgitation critical thought, words are extremely precious and delicate commodities. Either the other side needs to give up their indiscriminate plucking and recoding, or our side needs to exercise a little more caution. Both propositions speak to the suck factor of our situation.

*boggle*

Wow.





Does this mean Kathleen Sebelius will finally get confirmed?

John McCain is a Fucking Tool

Remember the John McCain we had during the campaign? The one who scoffed at Barack Obama's ability to get anything done in Washington because only he, St. John Bipartisan McCain, had an established record of putting partisan politics aside and reaching across the aisle for the greater good of the country? Yeah, that guy? He doesn't exist any more.

But this week, with President Barack Obama in the White House and McCain back in Congress, the Arizona senator has played a prominent and uncompromising role in rallying Republican opposition to the Democratic majority and its stimulus plan.

McCain's actions in the stimulus debate make for a very different leadership profile than he touted during the presidential campaign. His push for tax cuts as well as spending cuts, and his slashing, partisan rhetoric, are a far cry from his role a few years ago in leading a bipartisan coalition that sought compromise on how the Senate handles judicial nominations.

The Senate debate on the stimulus plan is only a few days old, but McCain's already demonstrating a distressing readiness to engage in campaign-style obfuscation to score political points at the expense of that greater good.

"This bill has become nothing more than a massive spending bill," he has said. "To portray it as stimulus flies in the face of reality."

Does McCain understand what stimulus is? It is an injection of cash into the economy, and providing federal and state agencies with funding to spend on projects that have to be contracted out to private companies that will then be able to, you know, pay their employees to do the work is a far surer syringe than yet another round of tax cuts that will ensure the wealthiest Americans have even more cash to sock away in untouchable offshore accounts. So yes, it is a massive spending bill. But it will spread the wealth to a far greater segment of the population and result in concrete, material results that benefit society as a whole than the same amount of money handed out in the form of tax cuts. And ain't nothin' wrong with that.

Let Rachel break it down for you.

Inauguration Day Occasional Liveblogging

7:57 (Tucson time): The flag is bungeed to the mailbox at home--lesbian resourcefulness at its best--and the coffee is brewing in the office. We have donuts. We are watching and waiting.

Michelle just handed a beribboned box--chocolates? cow print lingerie for Dallas?--to Laura, and now they're heading inside the White House for their own coffee. Not sure about the pale gold dress; I guess it's appropriately solemn and looks like it's warm enough to withstand a dash from limo to door without too much discomfort. Holding out hope that she'll change into something funner and more royal blue for the balls.

Jesus, look at all those people. My toes would be falling off at this point if I were out there. But it's an awesome sight and I hope things stay friendly and nobody gets stupid. Anticipating a stirring call to service in Obama's speech, and enough calls to unity and country to make even the bitterest heart swell with something approaching optimism. Bring it, Hopey.

8:22: I want a donut.

8:39: I should have known better than to get excited about Rachel co-anchoring MSNBC's coverage as long as Chris Matthews is anywhere near a microphone. He's talking over everyone, and I have yet to get a visual of the good doctor. Is she wearing a hat with ear flaps? That would be too adorable for words.

Oh, there's Ted Kennedy, in--as Tweety says--a Don Corleone hat. The man had part of brain hacked out, for chrissakes, let him be.

The White House doors have opened, so coffee must be over. Annnnd here come... Lynn Cheney and Jill Biden. Jill's curiously not sporting duct tape over her mouth, so coffee was probably every bit as entertaining as I suspected it would be.

8:43: John Kerry comes out in a gaggle of cowboys. I'm confused. And there's the Cheney lesbian. Now the sentries are saluting but no one's coming out. Awkward! Oh, now here comes Cheneybot on Wheels. Has anybody checked that cane he's holding across his knees? Not that Obama needs to worry; he'll probably accidentally plug Lieberman instead.

Ah, here come the boys. Oh, they're riding together. Awkward times two!

9:12: Mama Biden's in a wheelchair, but looks like she's ready to hop out. Olbermann says Bush 41 is "walking old." Concur. Bar hasn't changed a bit, which may be the singular advantage to looking like you're eighty throughout your sixties and seventies. Here are the Carters, looking good. Now Clintons. Love the color of Hilary's coat, and thank god the woman was sensible enough to wear pants on a cold-ass day.

9:21: Ooh, there's the Lincoln bible. It's big. Good thing Michelle's an athletic woman.

And there are the moving vans. Slightly less inspiring.

Squeeeee! Here come the girls! Sasha is rocking that orange scarf and mittnes. Again, love the color of Malia's coat. Do you sense a pattern here?

9:29: Look at all those people. Unreal.

Here come Michelle and Jo.

Tweety needs to STFU already. Oh, is Rachel still there? The boys actually pause long enough for her to both start and finish a sentence. I still have not seen whether my earflapped hat fantasy is coming true.

Here comes Bush. The crowd has burst into Na Na Hey Hey Goodbye, and the Marine band promptly strikes up a jaunty cover fire tune. Oh dear. It might be just people in the vicinity of the MSNBC mikes several hundred yards from the stage. Huh. Not sure if I should say funny as hell but not quite as classy as we would like, or not quite as classy as we would like but funny as hell.

Oh, here is the official Bush and Cheney introduction, accompanied by Boehner and some other douchebag. The tepidness of the applause is overwhelming, although MSNBC wisely switched to mikes on the stage rather than those in the midst of the rabble.

9:37: Biden. Feinstein and Pelosi. Obama coolly strolling through the corridor.

Oh, is Eugene Robinson still here? He manages to slide a word in edgewise past the Matthews/Olbermann goalies.

We switch to NPR out of frustration over the MSNBC audio freezing up. And hear an in-depth discussion of how many people are wearing purple. And red. And blue. And coats. And hats. WTF?

And here comes the man. Cool as a fucking cucumber as the bezillion people in the crowd go nuts.

10:26: Chief Justice Roberts mangles the oath, inevitably condemning us to four years of wingnuts howling that Hussein isn't really the president because he didn't recite the words required by the Constitution, but Obama follows up with a good speech. Nice shout-out to the atheists, major mad props for the shout-out to the Constitution, in whatever distant corner it's been cowering and whimpering for the last eight years, mush-appreciated reminder of that whole equality and justice thing.

Oh, and Rick Warren? Hypocrisy, ur nailing it egzactly. And I'm sure Jesus enjoyed you sharing with the crowd all the little pet names you have for him.

I'm not feeling the poem, but that's okay.

And I have no idea what Joseph Lowery is saying, but the cadence is nice. Oh, now I'm getting it. Maybe his mouth was cold at the beginning; lord knows I have trouble talking when my face is frozen. Now he's rhyming. Amen!

Now I want to watch the parade, and hope the video feed catches up a little. Are the shriners going to be there? It ain't a parade without a fez.

Meh.

My Facebook status says I'm sitting back and watching for a while, which was my personal admonition to self to absorb and think rather than scurrying off to blog each new thing rubbing me wrong when all I want is to join in the giddiness over the inauguration.

Uh, no, that didn't exactly last very long.

Rick Warren is America's Pastor^TM and it's high time I accepted it. The token bone tossed to the gay folk who got their knickers in a twist when the high-profile invocation gig was handed to a vocal homophobe turned out to have less meat on it than the Thanksgiving wishbone. Bishop Gene Robinson got the real opening invocation, we were assured, you know, because it happened first and was the big We Are One populist concert at the foot of Abe Lincoln's statue yesterday, and of course Team Obama had planned that invite way before anyone even knew Rick Warren was going to get center stage, so shush and be happy you're in the big tent. Except that nobody watching TV heard Bishop Robinson's invocation, because HBO didn't broadcast it. And no more than a couple dozen people at the Lincoln Memorial heard it either, because the sound system got shut off right before he began and only got turned back on in time for everyone to hear "Amen." And today we find out that the decision to schedule Robinson just before HBO's official start of coverage came not from HBO but from the Obama team.

And the keynote address for the MLK Day service at Ebenzer Baptist in Atlanta? Delivered by Rick Warren. Because nothing says equality like a guy who fights to deny certain peoples' civil rights.

Guess it's time to get over it. Rick Warren wins. Because working to eliminate poverty (good) trumps supporting African pastors who encourage murdering suspected witches (bad), because claiming to respectfully disagree about Biblical morality (good) trumps equating gay marriage to incest (bad). Complaining that Gene Robinson was rendered silent and invisible is the height of unappreciativeness because he got invited in the first place, and that should be more than enough. We Are One, unless we're gay, in which case we need to stop all the fucking whining, because apparently you're allowed to call dibs on discrimination, and when we bark back it makes us the bigots.

The Inauguration is about so much more. I want it to be about so much more, but how many times are we supposed to hold our noses and look the other way because we can find enough good to trump the bad that keeps tumbling out into plain view? It didn't need to happen this way, and that's the part that bothers me the most and tempers my enthusiasm, my hope, for what comes next.

Tomorrow I'll celebrate the exit of the most corrupt and destructive adminstration in American history. As for the rest, well, I'll be sitting back to watch.

Additional and far more eloquent commentary here, here, here, and here.

Obama Appointment Inside Analysis: Anonymous Source Edition

We can giggle nervously and uncomfortably about Obama's mulling CNN's very own Sanjay Gupta for Surgeon General--at least he hasn't gunned anyone down, unlike Tucson's very own Richard Carmona--but two done-deal appointments (Elena Kagan and Dawn Johnsen) are ones we can get behind and be happy about it. So says a friend with direct experience. From the e-mail machine:

I think that Elena Kagan as SG and Dawn Johnsen as head of the Office of Legal Counsel are both *excellent* picks. Kagan is almost literally universally admired on the left and right. She has had a stellar career and has really done wonders at Harvard (inc. recruiting top conservative law profs to the school). That she doesn't have appellate experience is not a big deal - other SGs have lacked it, and the key to the job is brilliant legal thinking and she's got that. It's of course possible she won't be the best at oral argument, but she'll probably do fine.

It will be hard for anyone to improve upon Paul Clement, the SG for most of the Bush years, who was truly an over-the-top brilliant amazing SG, probably the best appellate advocate ever in that spot*, but falling short of that is no shame. Anyway, while I guess she's liberal, I don't think that's shown up much in her work over the years, it's not a particular calling card of hers like it would be with, say, a Laurence Tribe or something, so it would be wrong for people to focus much on that. For 98% of cases, there's no difference between a conservative administration and a liberal one. The other 2%'s a bitch, but that's the way it goes, and it's Obama's call, not hers, which way the case will be argued (but obvs she has significant input into strategy on such a case). My Federalist Society colleague took a class from her at Harvard and said "she is a rock star."

As for Johnsen, I first came across her when I worked on the Violence Against Women Act. Johnsen was legal director of NARAL at that time so she was in on lots of lobbying and strategy sessions and I remember her well from that. I couldn't always keep up with the legal discussions over the bill at that time since it was before law school, but she was one of the few people who really stood out to me then for her astuteness and quick-mindedness and general brilliance. I've kinda followed her work over the years because of that connection, though mostly over the past few years that's meant seeing her on the Lehrer Report talking about executive power (and abuses thereof) under Bush, and she's been equally impressive on that front as on the feminist front. She worked at OLC long ago so she really knows that office, so I think it's a very good pick, and potentially the most important one he can make at DOJ. Any smart person can be SG -- I would've preferred Kathleen Sullivan over Kagan, but Kagan's a great choice -- but at OLC you really need someone who's truly brilliant for that office to work the way it's designed to (OLC's job is basically to set limits for the president, to know when to tell him NO, so you need a really good thinker to be able to set those boundaries properly, which did not happen under Bush b/c it was so politicized).

Also, there had been a lot of talk about Kagan maybe being Obama's first pick for Supreme Court justice. But by having her as SG, I think that goes out the window- I don't think he'd elevate her within a year or two, which is when the next opening's likely to occur. I think she'd reasonably have to be SG for longer than that. So I think this means that his first pick will be a minority, and I'm pretty sure he wants to appoint the first Latino to the court, which means Sonia Sotomayor's (brilliant 2d Cir judge who I think is pretty well-respected on both sides of the aisle) stock just shot up significantly. Also, IIRC, Sotomayor was put on the federal bench (district court) by Bush 1, then elevated by Clinton, so she's an even safer bet for Obama. I don't know whether she's been involved in any controversial decisions in the 2d Circuit that people could arguably characterize as ideological. Nothing jumps out at me.

* As a minor example of his brilliance, Clement never brought anything with him when arguing before the Supreme Court. He just went up to the podium and held court, as it were. Some arguments at lower courts are certainly doable without notes, but at the Supreme Court??? Dude, I love that guy - the best in the business. Extremely conservative, but still I can't think of anything that should keep him from the Supreme Court.

There was also an interesting tidbit at the end of the e-mail hinting at a rumor my source will not commit to characterizing as either wild or not so wild, that the vaunted Mediterranean diet may not be so heart-healthy as thought, at least not for one of the current supremes. Although, should Death come a-knockin', he'll most likely just say vaffunculo to Death's bony ass with a chin flick and be done with it. Interesting nonetheless, and possibly putting Kagan or Kathleen Sullivan in play for a second SC pick sooner than anticipated, so do stay tuned.

Cutting-edge analysis, we haz it!

Not That Much of a Stretch, Actually

Rod Blagojevich Misses Memo on 21st Century Happening, Acts Surprised to See Federal Agents

Jesus, Blago. You are an Illinois politician, but it's not the '50s or '60s anymore. Or the late '90s.

Federal authorities arrested Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich Tuesday on charges that he brazenly conspired to sell or trade the Senate seat left vacant by President-electBarack Obama to the highest bidder.

Blagojevich also was charged with illegally threatening to withhold state assistance to Tribune Co., the owner of the Chicago Tribune, in the sale of Wrigley Field, according to a federal criminal complaint. In return for state assistance, Blagojevich allegedly wanted members of the paper's editorial board who had been critical of him fired.

"I'm going to keep this Senate option for me a real possibility, you know, and therefore I can drive a hard bargain," Blagojevich allegedly said later that day, according to the affidavit, which also quoted him as saying in a remark punctuated by profanity that the seat was "a valuable thing — you just don't give it away for nothing."

Was Jim Edgar the last clean governor we had in Illinois? Lordy. Ethical behavior really needs to not be the sole property of Downstate Republicans.

Jan, Janet, What's the Difference?

The difference, unfortunately, comes down to life in Arizona having been mostly tolerable due to Democratic Governor Janet Napolitano's heavy veto pen keeping a rabid Republican legislature at bay, and now having the prospects of being far less tolerable once uber-conservative Republican Secretary of State Jan Brewer sails into the seat Napolitano will vacate in January to become head of Homeland Security.

That could result in the state pulling back from Napolitano-backed efforts on climate change, emissions caps, increased health insurance and education spending. It also could push the state forward on immigration controls and penalties for businesses hiring illegal immigrants and abortion rights restrictions, according to officials familiar with Brewer and Napolitano.

“I think we can kiss goodbye to the climate change efforts and any leadership on that,” said Sandy Bahr, state coordinator for the Sierra Club environmental group. “I don’t think much of the environmental progress will stay. With this legislature and Jan Brewer, we are in a world of hurt when it comes to protecting the state’s resources.”

Napolitano vetoed anti-abortion bills coming out of the Legislature, including a partial-birth prohibition that would have piggybacked on a federal ban. Napolitano signed off on some get-tough immigration bills forwarded by the right-wing Republicans but vetoed others.

For a state that is rapidly churning through its few remaining pristine open spaces that are in proximity to urban areas and has local and county boards that roll over for real estate developers on a regular basis, a state that languishes at the bottom of the nation when it comes to primary and secondary education and teen pregnancy, well, this isn't great news. It's spectacular for land speculators and the Southern Arizona Home Builders Association. Saguaros and public school kids in South Tucson? Not so much.

Jan Brewer also vigorously opposed the inclusion of language in the gay marriage-banning ballot measure explaining that gay marriage was already illegal under Arizona statute. And she was happy to bring the lovely Diebold touchscreen voting machines to Arizona, and then called Arizonans who objected to their use--after they had been demonstrated to be unreliable and unverifiable--anarchists and conspiracy theorists.

So Brewer and the Republican legislature get two years to de-fund public education and slash environmental protection in Arizona and make 700,000 East Valley voters deliriously happy to the point that they vote her back in for an additional 4 years, and in return Arizona gets... what? The honor and prestige of having an Arizonan serve as the head of a cabinet-level but really poorly structured department? And what, really, does Napolitano get out of it? If she manages to streamline DHS and get it to do something actually useful, like, say, maybe checking shipping containers and airline cargo, maybe she gets a pat on the head. Will it springboard her into the Senate, if that's where she sees this ending? Not likely.

Impending senses of doom keep me from my rest.

Democrats Still Befuddled by Meaning of Phylum Chordata

Oh, for fuck's sake.

Sen. Joseph Lieberman (I-Conn.) easily won a vote to remain chairman of a key committee today and will stay in the Democratic caucus despite his high-profile criticism of President-elect Barack Obama and his support of Sen. John McCain during the presidential campaign.

Senate Majority Leader Harry M. Reid (D-Nev.) said that "Joe Lieberman is a Democrat. He's part of this caucus."

Joe Lieberman is officially a ConnecticutForLiebermann-crat. If you've been busily blotting out your memories of the god-awful campaign season, like Harry Reid apparently has, Liebermann also stumped around the country for John McCain, whispered corrections into John McCain's ear, touted John McCain as the best hope for America, agreed that it really is a good question to ask if Barack Obama is a Marxist, and, oh, fretted out loud about the potential for America to be destroyed if Barack Obama, Democrat, were to be elected president. Joe Liebermann has also been a cheerleader for the Iraq war from Day One, and never hesitated to remind us that he believed John McCain has always been right on that account and Barack Obama has always been wrong.

In other words, Joe Liebermann has pretty much been functioning as a Republican in the Senate for a while now, so the Democratic leadership's worries about not having a 60-seat majority have been little more than insipid, poorly written theatre. Oh noes, they said, what if we offend Joe and he defects to the other side? News flash: he did that a while ago, propping up George Bush and talking shit about the Democratic presidential candidate to anyone who would listen. And your response to that is to say we need unity and all the Democrats we can find? Well, yeah, but this guy has not been interested in either unity or party discipline since Ned Lamont beat him in the CT Democratic primary way back when, so you need to aim a little higher when it comes to operationalizing your ideals and a little lower when it comes to giving somebody a much-needed kick in the ass out the door.

Obama seems to have wanted to keep that national security gavel in Joe's hands. Swell. Next!

The Line Forms to the Right

It may be time to change the blog's tagline to Furious Dyke, since recent events have left me fairly angry and bitter. Like, more than usual. Reading the paper with the morning oatmeal has found me muttering yes, and __________ can blow me with a distressingly increasing frequency, and I do not much enjoy starting my morning that way, particularly when most of the news of the day that follows elicits the same reaction.

First in line this morning to kiss my giant gay liberal ass? The Holy Church.

The nation's Roman Catholic bishops vowed Tuesday to forcefully confront the Obama administration over its support for abortion rights, saying the church and religious freedom could be under attack in the new administration.

"Religious freedom"has apparently been adopted as the new super!secret password for the fun new Catholic-Mormon clubhouse. After a busy Prop 102/Prop 8 season in which well-wishers reminded each other that squashing gay rights = religious freedom, I do not have the patience for this. Let's just run with the short version of the religious freedom argument, shall we? It goes like this: religious freedom means having the ability to force everyone to do things my way and my way only. Better yet, as very nicely written by someone whose name I have very unfortunately forgotten on one of the million blogs or blog comments I have read since election night, the even shorter version goes your continuing existence threatens my right to demand that you not exist.

Neither is a compelling argument.

Yes, the more complex version of the argument references healthcare workers who don't want to be forced to do the parts of their jobs that conflict with their personal consciences, or hospitals that don't want to extend the full spectrum of healthcare as a condition of receiving federal funding. The answer to that goes exactly this far: kiss my ass. If you do not wish to participate in abortion, get a job at a Catholic or other private hospital that pays their own way, or stay out of obstetrics. If you want your hospital to be eligible for federal funding, or if you want your practice to be able to apply for federal grants, suck it up and deal. If you want everyone who walks through your door to adhere to the precepts of your religion, whether they share that religion or not, slap a St. ______ sign over the door and be prepared to not have the best profit margin around. Or relocate your facility to Ave Maria, Florida, and hope that Tom Monaghan might bail you out.

Other people who can blow me this morning include the Daily Star letter-writer who admonished Sarah Palin for crossing her legs at the knees rather than the ankles whilst speaking to Hahmid Karzai, because the letter-writer has done some traveling and "knows how to behave, especially while in the presence of Muslim men." Really. Uh, Molly? Yeah, you can kiss my ass too, and so can the Muslim men whose delicate sensibilities need that kind of protecting.

Whew, it's shaping up to be a busy morning.

The Only Shock Is That It Took This Long

Round about the :40 mark, a woman in the crowd finally gives us the Michael Richards Moment that was bound to happen at a Palin rally sooner or later.

He's a n****r! Think Palin didn't hear that? Was the little stumble, the little stammer in her speech just a coincidence? It must have been. I mean, if John McCain can grab the mic back from his own Crazy Rally Lady and tell her that Obama is not actually Arab, you'd think Sarah Palin could take just a sec to say ooooh, now, we shouldn't be sayin' things like that, dontcha know.

Now that two white supremacist knuckleheads have been arrested for plotting to off a bunch of African-American kids as a warmup to killing Obama (whilst dressed in white tuxes and top hats? are sheets and hoods that declasse now in Appalachia?), can she credibly continue to pretend she just doesn't hear these things, or that people are yelling Trigger for her baby, or that... what? It was satire?

Yes, the ATF caught Mssrs. Cowart and Schlesseleman and foiled their long-on-ambition, short-on-reality plans to wreak murder and mayhem. That's the upside. The downside is that these two guys are complete idiots. If they were out there seriously contemplating assassination, how many others of a similar mindset but with actual intelligence and tactical capabilities are mulling their own shots at infamy, tacitly egged on by increasingly id-free rally attendees whose epithets have gone unchecked by the candidates they're shouting to? Does this disturb you? It disturbs me.

Weekend Palin update

Since I look to be spending the rest of the day on hold with various financial customer service reps as I continue to track down the swath of destruction my identity thief has left across the greater Southwest (motherfucker), it's as good a time as any to fling up the best Palin videos from the weekend. First, Jack Cafferty saying out loud what I honestly didn't think I'd hear a regular news guy say out loud on TV.

The second best part is him smacking down Wolf Blitzer's lame "but she was cramming a lot of information in there" excuse for her. The best best thing is Couric not even trying to hide her contempt. Which was dripping off her face and probably soaking the carpet. Call it what it is. Palin was playing McCain Mad Libs. We are fucked.

The scary thing about this one? Tina Fey's lines are lifted almost verbatim from Palin's actual responses to Katie Couric.

This post not sponsored by T-Mobile or Sprint, since Boltgirl totally anti-endorses them now for the unnerving way in which they apparently shrug and start up accounts for people whose "name" does not match the name on the credit report that comes back on the social security number they give. Which would be mine.

McCain Is Here to Help!

Dare I say it? Uh... thanks, but no thanks.

Six days of contentious negotiations looked like they were just about to culminate in a bailout proposal that House Democrats, Senate Democrats, and Senate Republicans didn't necessarily love, but could at least shudder equally at, when things came to a screeching halt courtesy of everyone's favorite screechers, House Republicans.

The result was a chaotic turnaround on a day that had seemed headed for a success that President Bush, both political parties and their presidential candidates could celebrate at an extraordinary White House meeting.

Weary congressional negotiators worked into the night, joined by Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson in an effort to revive or rework the $700 billion proposal that Bush said must be quickly approved by Congress to stave off potentially "a long and deep recession."

They gave up after 10 p.m. EDT, more than an hour after the lone House Republican involved, Rep. Spencer Bachus of Alabama, left the room. Democrats blamed the House Republicans for the apparent stalemate.

Well, it did take John McCain a while to actually make it to Washington, but since he suspended his campaign and all to--how did he put it? Ah, yes, to "meet as Americans, not as Democrats or Republicans" and solve the crisis. Things must have gotten better when he finally did show up to exercise some bipartisan leadership in that meeting he ordered up with Bush and Obama, right? Right?

At the bipartisan White House meeting that Mr. McCain had called for a day earlier, he sat silently for more than 40 minutes, more observer than leader, and then offered only a vague sense of where he stood, said people in the meeting.

In subsequent television interviews, Mr. McCain suggested that he saw the bipartisan plan that came apart at the White House meeting as the proper basis for an eventual agreement, but he did not tip his hand as to whether he would give any support to the alternative put on the table by angry House Republicans, with whom he had met before going to the White House.

He said he was hopeful that a deal could be struck quickly and that he could then show up for his scheduled debate on Friday night against his Democratic rival in the presidential race, Senator Barack Obama. But there was no evidence that he was playing a major role in the frantic efforts on Capitol Hill to put a deal back together again.

Oh. I've seen mutterings that Bachus' walkout was actually orchestrated by McCain so that he could swoop in and save the day with his own top-secret bailout plan, but the only competing proposal put forth thus far has been written by ten House Republicans shepherded by John Boehner, and which would appear to have less than a snowball's chance at passing.

Instead of the government buying the distressed securities, the new plan would have banks, financial firms and other investors that hold such loans pay the Treasury to insure them. Rep. Paul Ryan, R-Wis., a chief sponsor, said it was clear that Bush's plan "was not going to pass the House."

But Democrats said the same was true of the conservatives' plan. It calls for tax cuts and insurance provisions the majority party will not accept, they said.

At one point, several minutes into the session, Obama said it was time to hear from McCain. According to a Republican who was there, "all he said was, 'I support the principles that House Republicans are fighting for.'"

So a guy who has admitted he does not understand the details of the economy injects himself into proceedings he realistically has no business in, all in the name of bipartisanship and country first, and winds up in the corner of the guys who end up derailing what looked like an agreement on the first steps out of the mess.

Ah, it was just announced he'll go ahead and do the debate tonight, and we can assume Jim Lehrer will steer things much more toward the economy than had been originally planned. Maybe McCain realized that insisting on skipping the debate would only tie more anvils to his sinking ship. The ploy might have worked if he somehow had managed to at least present the image of leadership he inexplicably claimed in an area that is clearly outside of his expertise, unless he's finally ready to own that Keating Five line on his resume, but once his theatrical flouncing buildup fizzled into 40 minutes of silence in his showpiece meeting, well, that about did it. So stock up the cooler and ready your debate bingo cards. Obama has to recognize that the guy's on the ropes, and better come out swinging. Despite McCain's blunder, and, actually, because of it, this is a moment that has to be seized. Carpe that diem, Barack. You won't have a better chance.

Good News! Oh, Wait.

John McCain suddenly remembered he has a day job! But! He's rushing back to Congress to vote on the Protect Our Children Act I mean secure sorely needed infrastructure funding for Arizona single-handedly solve the bailout crisis! Which, you might recall, he knows exactly fuck-all about:



And which he can do about exactly fuck-all about in an official capacity, since he doesn't sit on any committees that are tasked with responding to the bailout proposal. So what's Bomb Bomb have in mind?

"I am calling on the president to convene a meeting with the leadership from both houses of Congress, including Senator Obama and myself," McCain told reporters in New York. "It is time for both parties to come together to solve this problem."

There was no immediate response from the Obama campaign.

There was no immediate response from the Obama campaign because they were trying to tone their gales of hysterical laughter down to a low giggle at the thought of one of the biggest deregulation whores in American history stomping up the steps of the capital to lecture Bernake and Paulson on what they need to do to fix this mess.

In short, this is political grandstanding at its finest. There's not a damn actually constructive thing McCain can do here, and he knows it, so instead he'll take the opportunity to leap into random action and imply that Obama Just Doesn't Care if he doesn't join in the thrashing about, while at the same time conveniently buying time by postponing a debate he may not have been ready to enter after a nine-point drop in the polls. Stay classy, Senator!

Full disclosure: I don't have the foggiest idea of how to fix things either, other than a $700B get-out-of-jail-free card for the firms that led the way to the crash not sounding like possibly the best thing we could have come up with. I am not, however, suspending my campaign for archaeological truth in order to storm Washington and make that fact abundantly clear to anyone who's listening.

In Which We Come to a Sad Realization

Oh, "in which we are dragged kicking and screaming out of denial" might be a more apt title, but the sad sad fact I can no longer ignore is that the Democratic Party exists solely to piss me off. Sure, McCain has ramped up the McNasty in the past few weeks, but he's been spouting distortions and misdirection and, and, what's the word that means the deliberate opposite of the truth? Oh, yes, lies, pretty much from day one of his candidacy. And the best Obama and the Dems can do as the electorate laps it up and runs around the house on a sugar high, crashing into the side tables and wrecking our best knickknacks from that trip to the National Archives, is say nyah nyah, old fart can't send an e-mail, but we sure do appreciate his heroic service to our country. They refuse to hit back hard because they said they'd stay on the high road--as did some other guy, if we recall correctly, some guy named Hero McHonor or something--and by god, they're going to stay out of the mud no matter how much the other guy flings into their faces as he merrily trip-traps into the White House and the country goes around the last bend into the deepest depths of the shitter.

Then we have the brave and mighty House Democrats getting so spooked by the spectre of thousands of Republicans chanting "drill, baby, drill" at the convention and tens of Republicans chanting "drill, baby, drill" at McCain's last campaign appearance that they abandon scientific evidence, economic evidence, and their own good sense and vote to allow offshore drilling that will do exactly nothing to solve either the current energy crisis or the future crises we keep putting off solving by adopting this kind of idiotic no-effect stopgap measure.

Maddow always says it better than I do:

A three-word chant is all it takes to make the Democratic majority knuckle under to a knucklehead position? I'm sure glad we all worked so hard two years ago to put more blue butts in those seats. I'm sure glad Nancy Pelosi has morphed into such a firebrand leader who works tirelessly to right the wrongs perpetrated by years of Republican control.

I'm mostly glad I'm too old to drink much any more, because these motherfuckers would have me under the table every damn night.

Oh My

In a brilliant move calculated to win the heart and vote of every middle-aged former slacker who was ever called on in class unexpectedly after a night of MTV and Atari 2600 instead of the assigned reading for civics class, Palin nails this exchange with ABC's Charles Gibson:

Gibson: Do you agree with the Bush Doctrine?

Palin: *blink*

Palin: In what respect, Charlie?

Gibson: The Bush -- well, what do you interpret it to be?

Palin: His world view?

Srsly?

Oh, absofuckinglutely beautiful! I got that look so many times from Mr. Chandler back in 1985! But! I was not running for Vice President of the US at the time!

I will not jump on Palin for saying we might perhaps have to go to war with Russia if Georgia were admitted to NATO and Russia happened to invade them again, since pledged military assistance is kind of the whole point of NATO in the first place. A better question might have been on her position on Georgia's (and other former Soviet republics') attempts to get into the military BFF club, given our current over-taxed military and substantially diminished standing as the world's primary law enforcement officer. That would be particularly interesting in light of Randy Scheunemann's preeminent position in the McCain campaign. Alas, it will have to wait until the debates.

Oh, and one more thing. I cannot take four more years of anyone in the executive branch pronouncing "nuclear" as "nookyooler." Please. If you cannot take a stand for responsibile foreign policy, environmental protection, renewable energy, women's rights, universal healthcare, and financial recovery, please at least take one for the language.

In Which We Watch a New Show

And so the new era begins. I liked the content, I liked the packaging. I liked a guest lineup that included none of the usual Robinson-Fineman-Turley fallback crowd from Countdown. I did not like the fake eyelashes, and think Maddow needs to be a tad more aggressive in reining in or smacking down Pat Buchanan if she's going to have him on there in the first place. And maybe find a more creative use for Kent Jones than just sticking him in the guest chair to run not-particularly-amusing pop culture video.

The best moment in the toss from Countdown came when Olbermann commented on her spinning red-white-and-blue graphics, and Maddow replied, "It looks like someone might win me at roulette." Ahem. Yes, me. Me me me.

Video should be available daily from MSNBC.