Boltgirl on the Loose: top chef

Showing posts with label top chef. Show all posts

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Dinner for the Morose

Some very important food blogs found while puttering around the various Top Chef recaps from last night:

Fancy Fast Food offers step-by-step directions (with pictures!) for remastering fast food standbys into classic cuisine standbys, more or less.

Le Chicken McConfit (Fancy Chicken McNuggets) by Erik of Fancy Fast Food (as seen on Citysearch’s The Feedbag) Ingredients: 1 ten-piece order of Chicken McNuggets 1 large French fries 1 medium Coke 1 Fruit & Walnut Salad 1 Barbecue sauce 1 Hot Mustard sauce 1 Sweet ‘N Sour sauce 2 bottles of water organic chives (for garnish and a touch of irony) By definition, a confit is prepared when a meat is slow-cooked in its own fat. For this Fancy Fast Food recipe, we will consider the fattiest part of the McNugget to be its breading. So after sorting out your ingredients, skin the McNuggets with a knife until you have a pile of McNugget skins. Put the McSkins in a food processor with about half a bottle of water, and blend it down to a fatty-looking mush. Pour the McMush into a non-stick skillet, add some more water, and bring it to a boil. Once it is bubbling, simmer it down and place the McNugget meat in the skillet. Cover and let it stew for 15-20 minutes.Meanwhile, clean out your food processor and then add the fries. Blend it down, adding water as needed, until it all becomes a soft potato purée. Then take some apple pieces from the Fruit & Walnut Salad and slice them into thinner slices with a knife. By the time you’re done with that, the McConfit should be ready. Take the McMeat morsels and let them cool. Finally, mix the three sauces in a measuring cup and stir until it has a consistent color.Now, the assembly: put the potato purée in the center of a fancy white plate, then top it with a layer of apple slices. Butterfly cut your McNuggets-turned-McConfit pieces and then place them on top of the apple slices. Drizzle the sauce around the plate, and then garnish with some chopped walnuts. Top it off with some slices of organic chives, and serve your soft drink in a wine glass. It’s McNifique! Video demonstration from The Feedbag’s vimeo channel: If you are viewing this recipe in an aggregator (like tumblr’s Dashboard), or as a reblogged post, please check out the real website at FancyFastFood.com.

Le Chicken McConfit, anyone?

Also, Insanewiches for inspiring photos but, regrettably, no recipes.

Solve it, eat it, whatever.

Top Chef notes from BoltLand are limited for the moment to (1) "a hot temper" and "procrastination" may be character flaws, but they are not vices; (2) all those chefs went with "heavy drinking" as their vice of choice to build a dish around since "black tar heroin" probably doesn't really bring out the flavor of scallops so well; (3) Michael I. apparently is confused and thinks he's in Gordon Ramsay's stable of douchetastically misogynistic contestants over at Hell's Kitchen rather than on Top Chef; (4) bacon doughnuts; and (5) BACON FUCKING DOUGHNUTS. WITH BEER CHOCOLATE SAUCE.

Note on Top Chef Masters, which finished up last night: please please please do this again next summer, Bravo. You don't even have to make it a competition--it was hugely satisfying to watch a group of very talented chefs get together every week and (with the exception of Michael Chiarello toward the end, and that Ludo guy) so clearly enjoy each others' company as they cooked and shared their experience with unfailing humor and grace. Just call it Top Chef Masters Cook and Drink and Shoot the Shit and I will watch that every week, maybe twice.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Top Chef Masters Tonight!

Woo hoo! I got over Carla's sad exit just in time, since my Top Chef jones gets marinated and grilled to a turn tonight with the premiere of Top Chef Masters. Hang on, let me see who my out-of-the-gate favorites are.

I think Tim Love, because he sounds nice and does a lot of charity work, and also has a classic burger joint. Also Elizabeth Falkner, because she's both out and a killer pastry chef who likes cupcakes (and she baked Del Martin and Phyllis Lyon's wedding cake!). Wylie Dufresne because he loves breakfast, and I spent the entire morning mournfully wishing for a plate of bacon and eggs. And he loved sweet Carla's green eggs and ham Quickfire dish during the last Top Chef.

Cooking shows involving challenges requiring the chefs to immediately spring into action, think on their feet, and still turn out creative, quality dishes are the best. Iron Chef America would be so much better if the chefs were actually blindsided by the secret ingredient rather than being given a list of possibilities ahead of time so they can prepare possible menus.

Potato chips, I must have potato chips when I watch Top Chef. A wretched habit I fell into during the last go-round, but so delicious. Yay!

Friday, February 27, 2009

Boo Hootie Hoo

Oh no! Carla, dear sweet nice cook-with-love Carla took some very bad advice from her sous chef and came in third in the Top Chef finale. We weep. And now annoying smug Hosea walks away with the title and the 100K, and we can't quite decide if this is better or worse than annoying cocky Stefan winning. Ugh. Ugh, ugh. Carla! Hootie! Please! Just trust your gut and quit letting other people make you second-guess yourself!

A lesson for us all, I suppose, where "us all" of course means "me." I totally get Carla wanting to compete without being devious or nasty, wanting to play nice and get along with everyone. And I totally get her innate lack of self-confidence and tendency to let stronger personalities talk her out of her own good ideas in favor of their own shitty ones. Stand up, woman, and let your own merits be enough, because they are considerable.

She helpfully listed her favorite DC haunts in a chat with the Washington Post on Wednesday, so if I'm ever there you will find me lurking on 14th near Adams, hopefully whispering Hootie? every time a tall African-American chef-like woman walks by.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

In Hootie Hopefulness

Go Carla!

programming note: I won't actually be watching the finale until tomorrow night--stay up until 11:00? Love ya, Top Chef, but I don't think that's happening--so don't spoil it for me in comments, por favor. Hopefully Friday will be one big giant Carla lovefest on the Boltblog!